Weekend Getaways – men versus women

When I was telling my husband about our weekend getaway, I became aware at how differently such a weekend would be viewed by males versus females.

  • Planning – Men– grab whatever is clean in drawers, throw in a bag, get in car and go.  Women – consult datebook, arrange babysitter, ensure enough food is left at house, emails about who will bring what, pack the night before, depart for trip with printed mapquest directions and a GPS.
  • Packing – Men – throw things in one vehicle.  Women – coordinate who is bringing what. Pack the night before. Fold everything neatly into a suitcase. Load suitcases into two or three vehicles. If scrapbooking, plan to take 2 vehicles for 4 people due to the large quantity of items packed.
  • Meals – Men – take out or fast food?  Pick up beer and chips at gas station.  Women – prepare detailed menu, complete with snacks.  Use GPS to find grocery store. Retrieve coupons from glove box and make sure at least one person has the grocery discount store. Go methodically up and down aisles buying things like brie, crackers, fruit, wine and coffee.
  • Beds – Men – throw sleeping bag on mattress.  Ensure no male is sleeping in the same bed as another male.    Throw suitcase in corner.  Women – determine who will share a bed and a room.  Make all beds with fresh sheets and distribute towels and handtowels. Unpack clothes and hang them up neatly in closet. Store suitcases under bed.
  • TV – Men- find sports. Turn volume up loudly. Yell at each other and TV.  Women – find music station and play quietly in the background so as not to distract from meaningful conversation.  Discuss families, children and jobs.
  • EntertainmentMen – find sports bar or sports on TV. Go hunting or fishing or 4-wheeling.  Women – scrapbook, knit or crochet. Pick up brochures to determine agenda for the day.
  • Sight-seeingMen – find pretty blondes on TV — see, what a sight!  Women – find winery or antique shop that features locals. Map out route so as to see the local attractions. Plan to leave so as to accommodate everyone.
  • LeavingMen – put on shoes and leave.  Women – plan who will shower first. Take 1 hour each to shower and put on makeup.  Depart several hours later.
  • Snacks – Men – chips from bag. Beer from can. Good.  Women – heat brie in oven. Place on coffetable on nice plate. Distribute crackers onto a serving platter. Distribute plates and napkins.  Pour wine into matching wineglasses, complete with stem decorations so that everyone knows which glass belongs to which lady.
  • Unexpected Tire changeMen – brag about past experience with vehicles. Break tire and jack trying to remove from car.  Jack up without consulting manual and break off floorboard. Curse at vehicles driving by for not slowing down.  Hurt back trying to be macho and lift things alone. Go home and brag to buddies.  Women – consult manual. Realize jack and tire are bolted down and can not be removed without following written instructions. Break into groups so as to flag down vehicles and safely change tire.  Find experienced help quickly.
  • HomecomingMen to Wives – what did you do all weekend (as he surveys the spotless house).  Women to Men – what did you do all weekend (as she surveys the damage left for her to clean).
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3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Wayne Augden
    Sep 21, 2011 @ 19:41:14

    LOL (Thinking what am I laughing about. I’m a man.) All I can say is not all men are the same, just as all women are neither flat chested or big bossomed. 🙂

    Reply

  2. Cheryl
    Sep 21, 2011 @ 22:24:17

    Hilarious! 🙂 Sounds like you had a good time with the girls!!

    Reply

  3. lostnchina
    Sep 26, 2011 @ 03:43:09

    Hear, hear!

    Well, at least you DID get to go away and have a good time!

    Reply

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